Generational Wisdom
Written by Tom Cooper
The Bible, like many other wise books, points out how essential it is for there to be an exchange of lived and received wisdom between the generations.
“Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children.” (Deuteronomy 4:9)
We have all had grandparents, but may not have known them; both of my grandfathers died before I was born. Yet I have still benefited from the elders in my life. If we are older, we might have the opportunity to pass on the best of the advice we have received to our children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or other young people. All of us have experienced many things in our lifetimes–from moonwalks to the 2008 financial crisis to the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic to the current social justice movements–that are important to us and to our communities, and that are worth sharing and remembering.
Here are a few precepts that I have gathered from wise elders from my own life:
Many people will help you in the course of your life. When that help is received in person, give your name and ask for theirs.
Lead the kind of life of faith that will encourage your great grandchildren to also have faith.
Listen more than you talk, and ask the questions that give you the opportunity to learn more about people and life.
Gratitude is the secret to happiness and joy, and is a discipline that should be practiced.
Humility is the admission that underserved grace has made all the difference in one’s life.
Remember to laugh at yourself. If this is rare, ask yourself why.
A person’s character is revealed by how they treat those who have less prestige, power, good fortune, or wealth.
Don’t take it personally; it is usually not about you.
Be generous with all of your blessings, and every so often do so anonymously and randomly.
What you DO is who you really are. Why you think you do something is far less important than what you actually do.
Jesus says to love our neighbour, and that our neighbour is everyone, but especially those we might least desire or expect.
Over the years I have met many individuals who have found great fulfillment in their life calling and yet are grateful and humble. One trait that marks these people is their willingness to listen and to be guided by other people’s wisdom.
We each need to reach out both to receive and to share the wisdom available to us through our communities and our lived experiences. Families and communities grow best into a profound generosity of spirit when wisdom is lovingly and open-handedly shared and received by all.
Blessings,
Tom
If you would like further resources:
An article on the benefits of having the old and the young connect:
Wisdom is best passed within a strong relationship, where not only the mentor’s words, but also the way they live out their lives and relationships, have influence. The tips in this article help in building stronger relationships across generations, including between grandchildren and grandparents:
Sharing wisdom often entails giving and receiving advice. Here are a couple of articles that talk about when and how:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-dance-connection/201902/you-give-advice
https://hbr.org/2015/01/the-art-of-giving-and-receiving-advice
If you would like a deeper dive into the benefits of integrating the old and the young, see this free, readable report: